Spring Cleaning for Body, Mind and Spirit

Guest post by Cheryl Nordyke and Kim Wierman

Spring is almost upon us. It is the time of year when we focus on new life as the world comes awake again from the winter dormancy. It is also the time that everyone is thinking about doing that dreaded Spring cleaning. For me personally, I love Spring cleaning because I am one those people that loves to purge. If I don’t need it why do I have it?

I think when most us think about Spring cleaning, our minds automatically go to the garage or storage shed. We think about opening windows wide as we polish the glass and hose down the screens. We think of airing out carpets and laundering the drapes, all of this in an effort to remove the dust and refresh the room.

Perhaps we should think about Spring cleaning ourselves. It may be that we need to freshen up our relationships, thoughts, or attitudes. Maybe there are regrets or feelings of anger that need to be hauled away. It may be that we have not wanted to face a bad financial situation. Regardless of our reason for storing things away the same is true; just because it’s tucked away in the back doesn’t mean it’s not still there.

If we approach Spring as the time of rebirth that it is for the world we can go through the attics and basements of our minds and hearts and see what has been stored there in the back corners that may need to be dusted off and dealt with. What kind of clutter have we been carrying around that just doesn’t need to be there?

One thing I love the most about the Spring cleaning process is that I find stuff I forgot I had. It gives me new ideas and items with which I can decorate and fresh up a room. Some of it may be old and forgotten but it is no less valuable or useful. After all, they say that one man’s trash is another man’s treasure. The same holds true with our feelings. Sometimes something we felt before has changed. We’ve grown and changed, or maybe the other person or a situation has changed since we stored those feelings away.

Bringing the problems or fears we have stored away into the light allows us a new sense of empowerment. Once they are brought into the light they are almost never as bad as the fear or anticipation of what they mean. Once brought out of darkness we may realize our fear of them was much greater than the reality of facing them. Even if the fear holds true, you are not helpless in doing something to conquer them. It may be mediation or yoga to bring peace to your mind or taking some other kind of proactive step toward refreshing yourself.

The process of doing this is much like Spring cleaning. You will feel like the freshly cleaned room: brighter, cleaner, renewed and refreshed. You will no longer have the dread of having to take care of it. You will soon wonder why you didn’t do this sooner.

Now we are ready to face the next season with a fresh attitude and a much lighter spirit.

Cheryl Nordyke and Kim Wierman are the founders of Waves of Gratitude - a company that exists because of their belief that when life presents you with professional and personal difficulties, a strong foundation of gratitude can help turn those difficulties into opportunities. The owner’s resolve to build a future based on a foundation of gratitude is unwavering. The pair created an online store to give everyone the opportunity to “wear” powerful symbols of gratitude, jewelry and apparel made to personalize the concepts of hope, love, legacy, creativity, optimism, inspiration, confidence and awakening that make everyone beautiful inside and out.

Gratitude and Envy May Be Closer Friends Than We Think

Image by Dare Darlington

Guest post by Vania Tashjian

The Embarrassment of Envy

Lately, I’ve found myself feeling envious of some of my friends. They have what I want – a job they enjoy. On some days, just a job will do. I’ve been organizing and working from home for two years now, which I love for many reasons. But, I really miss working with people and collaborating. And, I miss my previous career (consumer insights and retail development).

In contrast, I realize I may have what many of my friends want – a flexible schedule, being my own boss, a job based on a hobby, etc. So, it’s hard for me to admit that I feel envious of a friend, let alone several. I’ve been taught that feelings of envy or jealousy, or any other “negative” emotion, is bad.

Based on my Counseling Psychology studies at CIIS, I’m grateful to now have a much more in-depth understanding and appreciation of the full range of our emotions – both “positive” and “negative” – and their usefulness. I’m certainly not suggesting that the entire range possible feels super comfortable. Let’s face it, feeling envious or angry can suck. But overall, emotional literacy and normalization are really important to me. After spending most of my life running away from the feelings deemed negative (like envy) and toward the ones that feel positive (like gratitude), I want to embrace and use them all as guides (like GPS) to further my growth.

If you’ve grown up in this culture, chances are you know what I’m talking about. We want to feel good all the time. And, we expect to. But sometimes, feeling bad (e.g., envy, anger, frustration, worry, etc.) can be an opportunity to make course-corrective decisions to help get us back to feeling good. 

Feelings Are Reflections
Obviously, envy is not a new emotion for me. But it’s a particularly uncomfortable one to feel with friends, whom you love and support – the very people you want to see succeed and be happy. When we don’t feel good, we certainly don’t want to attribute any of it to our friends or loved ones. Or, do we? What if we can learn to see our friends as our ticket to an improved life?

Feeling a difficult emotion, or feeling bad, can reflect something that is not going as we’d expect or like. Relative to my envy, it’s a clue that there is something I want that I don’t yet have. Thankfully, I have people around me who serve as real-life examples to demonstrate what’s possible for me. Through the realization of what is missing in our lives, we gain clarity around what we want.

Negative emotions also offer an opportunity to clean house. Because they alert you that something is not quite right, you have a chance to explore what this may be. When you allow yourself to dig in, you get to the bottom of what it is that’s been throwing you off kilter. And when you uncover what’s not working, you are presented with an opportunity to clean up this energy by course-correcting.

Where The Trouble Lies
Where we get into trouble is twofold.

1. When we dwell in our emotions for too long, rather than being galvanized and guided toward a different direction by the hurt, we may end up more firmly planting ourselves in the pain and not taking advantage of our emotions as a helpful tool.
2. When we don’t understand the difference between feeling an emotion and acting on it. We often mistake anger with lashing out, or resentment with revenge, therefore we either attempt to casually dismiss or repress how we feel. If we ignore or dismiss what we feel, we dismiss what we need and who we are. While we also need others to see ourselves, validating our emotions is an important step to validating ourselves. Feelings we can’t control, but our behavior we can manage.

Use Your Feelings: They’re A Free Gift
Ultimately, it’s not that we don’t want our friends to succeed or be happy. It’s that we’re trying to get clear on what we want to succeed and be happy. We learn about ourselves and what we want in life through our relationships, through the moments that make us feel good and the ones that result in discomfort.

I want to show up to a work environment I love and do great work with great people. And my emotions – positive and negative – are helping me get really clear on what type of work I’d like to do, my ideal work environment and what tools I need to thrive.

I’m not saying this process is easy. But the discomfort we experience when our negative emotions arise has more to do with our resistance to them, rather than the emotions themselves. The more gratitude I feel for this process, the more I embrace all my feelings as a loving guide. The more I embrace my feelings, the easier it gets.

Guest post by Vania Tashjian Frank, author of MyHappimess, a conscious living blog dedicated to learning how to use discomfort (fear, frustration, anxiety, anger, etc.) to grow and create joy. To learn more about how a conscious life = a happy life, visit myhappimess.com.

Thankfulfor Dr. Seuss

“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You’re on your own. And you know what you know. You are the guy [or gal] who’ll decide where to go.” - Dr. Seuss

In celebration of Dr. Seuss’s birthday on March 2nd (yes, a couple days back, but in my world birthdays are quite special and last a week!), I share with you a quote for all to know and believe! As long as we have our health, we can achieve whatever we set our minds to. As long as you acknowledge those who assist you along the away, you’ll be set to go in any direction. Remember to express gratitude for those who support you. Remember that you can make the right decision! Now, go and make today Your Day!

Daily Dose of Inspiration - Ralph Marston

We’ve got a long list of motivators here at The Nest (that would be our Thankfulfor team headquarters) and one of them is Ralph Marston. He’s just one of those special people who can communicate a thought - maybe an idea you’ve even heard before - in a way that makes you sit up and take notice. I first started following him on Twitter and then noticed his quotes on other people’s blogs. Here is todays message:

Is there something outside of you that’s troubling you? The distress you’re feeling is not from the thing itself.

The distress you experience is from what you think of it and the way you feel about it. You can change that in an instant.

You can change what you fear into what you eagerly anticipate. You can change a burdensome problem into a magnificent opportunity.

The vast majority of all that happens in this enormous universe is out of your control. And yet with every bit of it, you can control what it means to you.

Do you fully realize how much power that gives you? Do you understand the unlimited nature of what you can do with whatever you have?

Just by the way you choose to accept and to make use of reality, you can bend that reality to empower your own unique purpose. See what is, accept what is, and use it to achieve your finest dreams.

— Ralph Marston

You can enjoy his daily motivations on his site, GreatDay.com, or sent to your email inbox or via Twitter. Mr. Marston also has a few books - one of them is called The Daily Motivator To Go and is perfect for a quick dose of inspiration. I also love him because he’s all about convenience! If you’re more likely to check out your phone than a book or  email, he’s got you covered. Just visit greatday.com/iphone or greatday.com/mob.

What are your favorite sites or who do you follow on Twitter for inspiration?  We’d love to know so post them in the comments please.

Joy Interrupted?

Image by flickr user amboo who?

Guest post by Leigh Ann Napier

Bills due. Money’s tight and your pants are too (stress craves ice cream). House is a mess. Husband is grouchy. You run into a friend who not only looks great but seems to have a fabulous life only to realize later you had a Cheerio in your hair during your entire conversation.

This, my friend, is life.  I don’t know if you can relate to any of these things but that is the case for me more times than I would care to admit. Your situation is different obviously. Maybe better, maybe worse. Either way, I am confident of this: If you are alive, your life isn’t perfect. Your marriage, your kids, your job, your domestic skills, your body…all imperfect. It is great to make strides toward improving these things.  Just don’t hold your breath for perfect. Won’t happen. In this life, it is not IF we will have trouble but WHEN.

This is hard for me to swallow as an optimist. I have found though, that it is so much easier to live day to day knowing that in spite of our troubles, we always have a choice. We can choose to believe the best about others (particularly our husband and children). We can choose to focus on the things that are going well in our lives. We can still choose to take the time to laugh and enjoy the people and the blessings God has given us this day. We can choose to stop and give thanks when life isn’t perfect. Give thanks for what we’ve had, what we have now, and for what is to come.

Life has a way of making our troubles seem urgent and encouraging us to procrastinate our joy.  Don’t fall for it!  If you are waiting for your “to do’s” to be done or for this crisis to pass before you enjoy your life- you are being deceived.  After this crisis passes another one will be right on its tail.  Don’t allow your circumstances to dictate your joy.  Don’t allow setbacks, delays, or disappointments to prevent you from taking time to give thanks.

Here are a few FREE things that you can do to add joy to your life.

•    Go for a walk
•    Call your mom
•    Have sex with your spouse…
•    Laugh more
•    Tickle your kids (or your spouse)
•    Pet your pets
•    Make a list of all you have to be thankful for…and refer/ add to it often

Now, pick a few and start enjoying your life more…today!

“These are my wonderful girlfriends who bring so much joy to my life.  We laugh together and cry together and share our imperfect lives with each other.  So thankful for their friendship!”

Front Row Left to Right: Elaine Kaiser, Shanea Garretson
Back Row Left to Right:  Stacy Dixon, Margo Branham, Leigh Ann Napier, Ashley Leimer, Sarah Rowe -  Also not pictured but equally loved Emory Spradlin (since moving to Florida it has been harder for you to come to Girls’ night but we love you just as much!)

This week’s guest post was written by Leigh Ann Napier, iBloom Life/Marriage Coach. Leigh Ann works with women who “refuse to crash” in their marriages and helps single/engaged women who want to plant seeds for a fruitful, loving & lasting marriage. She provides coaching, encouragement and resources to women and helps them promote intimacy and understanding with their mate.

Thankful for… Friends and Shoes

Image courtesy of GiGi Downs.

Guest post by Cheryl Nordyke

One of the things men have been unable to understand about women is our love and need for so many pairs of shoes.  Why do we need the exact same pump in more than one color?  Regardless of the fact that they are not even close to the same pump.  One has a peek-a-boo toe for when I want to look a little sexy.  One has a sling back for when I want to be elegant.  They each have different characteristics and represent a different trait of mine.

Like shoes another aspect of our lives that men are perplexed by is our friendships with other women.  They don’t get our connection to them and our desire to share almost everything.  Men don’t understand how we can in one week spend so much time texting, talking on the phone and emailing our friends about every little detail of our lives. They don’t fully comprehend the need we have for a girl’s night out to just be ourselves, not a wife or mother.

Our shoes give us a boost and add a little variety and flare to our outfits and our personalities.  Take those peek-a-boo pumps and get rid of the business suit. Throw on a pair of jeans and you go from casual to trendy and fun.  Shoes can make us feel sexy, fashionable, fun, edgy, bold, and brilliant.  Those old Converses are for a night out with the girls to see Bon Jovi and they take us back to the days when husbands and kids were only a dream.

Our friends, like our shoes, give us variety and flare:

• My friend Ginny is a wine enthusiast as well as a mother of 5.  She is great to share life’s obstacles and dreams with while sampling a good Pinot.

• My friend Robbie has known me since I was 18.  She understands my history having lived much of it with me.  She understands my moods and reminds me when I doubt myself how far I have come.

• My friend and sister Di is my idol.  She has never fully accepted that role in my life yet that is how I see her.  She is the one person I want to impress.  She understands our childhood, and makes me laugh like a child again.  She may not live close, yet is very close to my heart.

• My friend Carrin and business partner is my sounding board.  She is my inspiration and reminder that life is sometimes better if we let our hair down every once in while and just get crazy.

• My newest friend Kim is both a friend and business partner.  She has taught me to act—to actually do what you say you are going to.  This was never difficult for me to do for someone else I worked for.  When we decided to move forward with our business she held me accountable.  Although I haven’t known her that long and our religious affiliations may have been different I feel a bond to my grandmother through her.  She reminds me that life has so much meaning and purpose.

• My friend and saving grace has been Sheri.  In a very short period of time she opened her home to my daughter when work took me away from my home.  She is quirky and funny with that Jacqueline Kennedy class and style.  She reminds me to always laugh no matter what life throws at you.  I don’t think I know anyone that smiles as much as she does.

Like each pair of shoes brings out different elements of my character and personality, each friendship does the same and more.  As women we are lucky to be able to open ourselves up and share our quiet side, our perky side, our tomboy side, and all the different elements of who we are.  By doing so we continue to grow into being whom we are meant to be.  As our shoes add flare to our outfits, our friendships add flare and variety to our lives. Thank you to all my friends who have helped me get here.

Cheryl Nordyke and Kim Wierman are the founders of Waves of Gratitude - a company that exists because of their belief that when life presents you with professional and personal difficulties, a strong foundation of gratitude can help turn those difficulties into opportunities. The owner’s resolve to build a future based on a foundation of gratitude is unwavering. The pair created an online store to give everyone the opportunity to “wear” powerful symbols of gratitude, jewelry and apparel made to personalize the concepts of hope, love, legacy, creativity, optimism, inspiration, confidence and awakening that make everyone beautiful inside and out.

Gratitude, Put Simply

This simple list sort of says it all.

loveandzombies:

today i am grateful for:

• a busted knee allowing me a couple days of nothing but reading/writing/getting re-inspired
• sleeping in
• waking up in pain & being snuggled back to sleep by momo & nate
• a successful experiment in baking: my first coffee cake!
• nintendo ds
• icing my knee when everything is cold & snowy
• long johns
• new friends
• feeling braver
• amazing sunsets
• poetry
• inspiration
• passionate artists
• warm soup
• meaningful work
• friendly co-workers
• finding my way through a really rough patch

Money Does Not Buy Happiness

We have come to this realization again with proof! The UK Telegraph reports that Austrian Millionaire Karl Rabeder is giving away all of his $3 million fortune because “it prevents happiness to come.” Rabeder is currently selling his mountain-top villa in the Alps, and has already rid himself of all of his luxuries including a Audi A8 and six full-size gliders, which he gained from his interior furnishings and accessories business.

“For a long time I believed that more wealth and luxury automatically meant more happiness,” he said. “I come from a very poor family where the rules were to workmore to achieve more material things, and I applied this for many years,” Mr Rabeder said.

“More and more I heard the words: ‘Stop what you are doing now – all this luxury and consumerism – and start your real life…I had the feeling I was working as a slave for things that I did not wish for or need.”

All of his money will now be in the hands of his microcredit charity, with the goal of offering loans and business development aids to entrepreneurs in Central and South America.

By listening to the “voice” of his heart and soul, Rabeder now feels “free.”

We at Thankfulfor don’t expect everyone to stop making money or give it all away, instead we mention this generous man as a symbol to reiterate the point that we all need to look are our lives and realize what is important. Recognize what you have and what you have to give.

There is nothing wrong with enjoying your luxuries and making good money, the key is to take a second each day to be grateful for what we have. Today we are ThankFulFor Karl Rebeder, a man who is looking past his own desires to help those in need.

Moving Past the Hurt

Image by Flickr member TheeErin

Guest post by Cheryl Nordyke

Here is a question for anyone following along.  When do we allow ourselves to feel sorry for ourselves?  To live within whatever emotion it is we may be feeling?  If we allow ourselves to feel hurt or angry how long do we allow ourselves to stay in that state?  I mean every person alive has something in an almost daily basis they could be angry or hurt over.  Do we allow those emotions to control our attitude for the rest of the day or do we realize, “Yeah that pissed me off” and then get over it.

I know you are wondering ‘how is this inspiring’ or have anything to do with being grateful  - here it is:

If I am healthy, have a roof over my head and a place to rest my head then should I be angry my friend didn’t return a call or my date stood me up?  And if we get to walk around angry about that then how angry do people get to be that don’t have what we have or that aren’t healthy.  Someone said, if we look for reasons to be disappointed we will find them.  How about this: maybe your friend didn’t call you back because something bad happened, maybe you got stood up and the guy wasn’t meant for you. Maybe the No’s in life are the universe’s way of telling us we are going in the wrong direction and to get on with our lives.

I am grateful that for the most part in my frustrated moment there is always something within a very small window that reminds me how blessed I am. I am wearing my Waves of Gratitude Health Wave necklace today because it is a beautiful and meaningful symbol of my gratitude for health. To all of you who are part of the blessings in my life, thank you.  To anyone reading this take time to tell those who make your life better, thank you.

Cheryl Nordyke and Kim Wierman are the founders of Waves of Gratitude - a company that exists because of their belief that when life presents you with professional and personal difficulties, a strong foundation of gratitude can help turn those difficulties into opportunities. The owner’s resolve to build a future based on a foundation of gratitude is unwavering. The pair created an online store to give everyone the opportunity to “wear” powerful symbols of gratitude, jewelry and apparel made to personalize the concepts of hope, love, legacy, creativity, optimism, inspiration, confidence and awakening that make everyone beautiful inside and out.